Darwin

Darwin started feeling poorly about two weeks ago, but up until last Friday he was eating, even though he only wanted treats and no regular food. From Friday last week I noticed that he did not eat at all, and he did not even eat any treats. On Monday last week I took him to the vet who checked him out and did some blood tests. They came back normal, apart from some inflammatory signs, so he got an anti-inflammatory shot and I took him back home. The vet said to give him a week to get better. They did weigh him and he was only 5.5kilos. At the last weigh-in in July he was 7.2kilos. That is a lot of loss in a very short period, as he was fine until around 2weeks ago.

We took him home, and on the Tuesday he did eat a little bit, and he did have a few bits of soft foods on the Wednesday, but then he was back to not eating. I thought it could possibly be something in his mouth as he did try to eat but food just wound not stay in his mouth. We tried to give him some boiled white fish but he could not eat that either even though he did try.

Well, we took Darwin to the vet again yesterday, and the vet is not at all optimistic. He said that because of the blood tests being normal it is very likely that there is a cancer somewhere in his body. So, we are taking him back on Thursday for a scan, and then we will have to make a decision based on what the scan shows if it shows anything.

I have told my husband that my main concern is that he is not in pain. If there is nothing to do about him, and he is not in pain we will bring him home to die. If they think he is uncomfortable then I have said I would rather let him go on Thursday. I am not going to accept having him go through any surgery or treatment at his age and condition. He is almost 14 years old, he is so frail that he seems to find it difficult to walk, he cannot jump up on the table like he used to. He tried the other day to jump up and he slipped back down on the floor. He can jump up and down from sofa and bed, but that is it. He does not eat anything at all, he only drinks and sleeps...he did have a cuddle (ish) with me on the sofa this morning. Well, I kept to his head and chin and very very gently stroked his back just so I did not hurt him. I can imagine that he is feeling sore after loosing so much weight and not being well...just want him to know we are there for him. I will go spend a bit of time on the bed with him later. It is hard not to know how long he has left.

I am not very bothered about doing much around the house and I find it difficult to be inspired to do any stitching at the moment. I am trying to get the model stitch done for Vicki, but that is really as far as I go. I am looking forward to having hubby home for Christmas and New Years. He is working today and tomorrow and Friday, and then he is off until the 2nd January. I am glad he is off on Thursday so he can be there with Darwin. I do not think that I could be dealing with a difficult decision without him.

I am going to make a list of what to do until the move, reading wise (I haven't read a book in months...have to prioritize reading or stitching...don't know why I feel I can only do one or the other...) and stitching wise, plus the packing and planning the move and trying to find a job.

It seems that life is very hard at the moment...I really hope that things will resolve soon...it is difficult enough having to deal with finding a property to move to in Inverness while we are in Orkney, and trying to find a job, and doing the packing, and dealing with stormy weather, and then having Darwin being as ill as he is...

Just look at our gorgeous boy...